I'm back!

So, I know I said I would be updating this daily, but seriously i've had a pretty busy couple of days. Now this is probably the time when any other blogger would explain that he got a bit drunk, went to a few house parties, maybe even make up some lie about being swarmed by beautiful women so being unable to get to his computer (though I should note at this point, any mention of beautiful is entirely fact - chicks dig Dom)

So, yeah where do I begin. Basically I was on the way back from an enjoyable visit to a close personal friends house on Wednesday when I saw the air shimmering in front of me. Now most people would blame this on drink or drugs or whatever, but it is a well known fact that I am entirely T-total. In fact if anyone so much mentions Alcohol to me I run away screaming in terror. Well, actually that's a lie, as a Domist a have a massive appreciation for all forms of Alcohol (except Strongbow which does... strange things it me)

BACK TO MY POINT

So, I was trying to get past this shimmer when some sort of crack in the pavement made me slip. I woke up and found myself in a small town, no phone reception, no computers, no nothing. I asked around to find out where I was. Luckily, I could speak the local dialect and I found out I was in the town of Nazerath or some sort of foreign name like that. I spent a few days chilling there, slept with some kinky little thing called Mary and whatever then woke up on the pavement as if i'd simply slipped. It was however, now friday. I gave Nathan a call, and stoic as ever he offered toletme come over and drink beer and watch football with him whilst I recovered.

I would have written this last night or earlier but I was so devestated by the football result and the discovery that the world is now massively different, that I thought i'd leave it a little while. Turned out that little whore Mary blamed God for impregnating her instead of telling her husband the truth. So yeah. I'll try to keep up in future.

Hamsters, Dentists and Free Beer

I suppose you could call today somewhat eventful? Well, maybe if you were a sloth but I digress. What I mean is today there were events. Not even capital letter Events, just small every day events which nevertheless I will share with you.

So, I recently bought a hamster. Her name is Cheesecake and she is an Albino. I have moved her cage. That is a small event, but it could have big repercussions as her wheels newly close proximity to my head would cause me to become nocturnal and thus improve my chances of becoming some sort of masked vigilante. Possibly with a hamster theme.

Also today I went to the dentist for some fillings. The Dentist offered me an injection because one of the fillings could be painful. I, being a Man, declined the offer, but if it made him feel better, I said I would whilst he was giving me my fillings, wrestle a bear. This made him certain I am a Man. It is after all Man Day. This allowed me to have the undoubtedly enviable experience of feeling a small Indian man using a drill possibly larger than himself to drill through my teeth. I could feel the very nerves screaming. Luckily, I am Man so I did not cry, I did not admit to the pain, I just got through it and was applauded for my manliness and well cared for teeth (and general appearance). As thanks for his service, Dr. Panwar and myself did a manly chest-bump. For we are Men.

Another event which is occuring for me today is FREE BEER. Bah, you may say, before I then go on to say more. It is more than free beer. A research company is actually paying me and my best friend money to sit there for an hour and drink their beers and tell them what we think. This is great fun. I think I may go to the pub afterwards in celebration. Of course, I was given muchos free beer the other day as well, after working the BBQ at the pub for hours but that was slightly dampened by the fact that my hard earned wages were also robbed on the way home and the pub has now lost it's licence (Unrelated reasons)

Genesis

Like all good religious works i've read, we start with Genesis. Which is where I take the time to explain where the world comes from and basically to introduce you to the word of Dom. So, here we go.

In the beginning there was a mummy universe and a daddy universe, they got together did the bad thing and made a baby universe. This is where we live like little bacterium inside the bugger. It's not called the Big Bang for nothing.

All the bacterium made up lots of stories to explain where the world came from and like many stories, the longer they are believed the truer they become - take this from a compulsive (and more importantly successful) teller of tall tales.

What inspired me to make this blog you might ask? Well, for a start i've always wanted to write a book of Dom, just to show the world what I think about it and it's denizens. I am a lazy bugger though so doing it day by day in a blog seems like a good idea to me.

Much props also have to go to my older brother, Tyler who has a blog here which is likely much more coherent than my own. Go read it, you may just learn something.

So, hey, thanks for listening i'll be around whenever I have something to say